The Power of Agreement

What makes you feel more grounded when working, living, or dealing with another human being – an expectation or an agreement?

An expectation is a projected ideal about how someone or something should be, do, or behave. It’s us up here, and them or that down there, and we’re waiting for them or that to measure up.

An agreement is a handshake, a contract, a signature that begins on equal footing. It’s a compromise. Reciprocity. It’s (ideally) transparency.

An expectation is holding. And holding. And holding. Until it is met (unless it is never met).

An agreement simply holds together.

An expectation is a burden one often bears on their own.

An agreement is a burden which is ultimately shared.

Which do you think is heavier, drains more energy, and tests your willpower?

Initially, reaching an agreement can take blood, sweat, and tears. And it may never happen if one in the party refuses. But at least the load of the expectation is off.

Expectations are easy and seemingly automatic to form. They don’t really take much work initially. But they can certainly take a rollercoaster of a toll physically, mentally, and emotionally.

I made an agreement today. And guess what happened?

The mental chatter stopped. My back released. And the nervous tension went away.

It was a simple switch, but a powerful one to consistently consider…